The pain is real!

Can we normalize the fact that people heal at different speeds, and that it’s perfectly okay?

I recently saw a video where a person was shaming another for taking too much time to heal, and it reminded me of a situation that happened to me many years ago. I had appendicitis and had to have it removed. I experienced complications during the operation and afterwards, to the point where my body stopped breathing on its own.

When I got home, the workplace I was at the time told me, “So and So had the same operation and she was back after 2 weeks.” They refused to give me access to the forms for short-term disability, saying I wouldn’t need it. I was full of pain meds and didn’t have the energy to fight for myself then. I wish I had been clearer of mind and stronger at the time to explain that the two situations were, in fact, different. Just because it took 2 weeks for So and So, I had complications and would probably need more time. I ended up being pressured to return and ended up with additional pain due to scar tissue from getting back to normal activities too quickly.

People’s situations are different, people’s bodies are different, and people’s mental health is different. It is perfectly normal and okay for people to take different amounts of time to heal. There should be no situation in which someone is shamed for taking longer.